Please note: You are viewing the pre-MediaWiki version of the Homestar Runner Wiki. Editing is disabled for purposes of historical preservation.
|
Note: When you see ( ), this means it is a message in the cartoon. Not an action or spoken words. ---- liato's transcript of the olde version of The King of Town. Olde Version: (This is the King of Town) [King of Town pops up] (He is a good king and he rules the land quite nicely) [Pan of 'the land'] (But he worries all the time) KING OF TOWN: [cries] My sheep are missing! My sheep are missing! (And I'm afraid that a dragon has gobbled them up!) [Scene shows what the King of Town thinks happened] ''(So he called Homestar Runner and Pom-Pom and asked if they would help.)" HOMESTAR RUNNER: [nods] Ooookay! (So they questioned the Blacksmith...) [Blacksmith shrugs] (They questioned the Poopmsith...) [Poopsmith shrugs] (And finally they questioned the King's Chef...) [The Chef nods] [Homestar and Pom-Pom look at each other, suprised] (So they gathered everyone together) [Blackboard appears and graduate cap and pointer fall into Homestar's head and non-existent hand from above] HOMESTAR RUNNER: [while drawing a sheep and a dragon] I have found that the King's sheep were not' eaten by a dragon [X's off dragon]'' KING OF TOWN: Phew! HOMESTAR RUNNER: ... but, they were eaten! KING OF TOWN: Oh, no! What could have done such a thing? HOMESTAR RUNNER: Why don't you ask yourself, King? [pokes King's belly with pointer] KING OF TOWN: ...Oh, yeah. They were delicious! [blushes and burps] [everyone laughs as we pan out of the castle onto a sheep grazing in the field] ---- Corinne's transcript of the new version of The King of Town. [This is the King of Town] [King of Town pops up] [He is a good king and he rules the land quite nicely] [Pan of 'the land'] [But he worries all the time] King of Town: [cries] My sheep are missing! My sheep are missing! And I'm afraid that a dragon has gobbled them up! [Scene shows what the King of Town thinks happened] KING OF TOWN: Get me Homestar Runner! [bugle sounds, and Homestar and Pom Pom walk in] HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hey, King, what's up? KING OF TOWN: [cries] My sheep are missing! My sheep are missing! [cries] [Homestar looks at Pom-Pom] KING OF TOWN: [cries] I'm inconsolable!! HOMESTAR RUNNER: Okay, I guess we'll help you find your sheep then! [to Pom-Pom] Pom-Pom, let's get out of here! [And so...] [They questioned the Blacksmith...] HOMESTAR RUNNER: I say, fair Blacksmith, have you seen the King's sheep? BLACKSMITH: [Blacksmith shrugs] [in a very deep and quick voice] No. [They questioned the Poopmsith...] HOMESTAR RUNNER: I say, fair Poopsmith, have you seen the King's sheep? [Poopsmith shrugs] [And finally, they questioned the royal chef] HOMESTAR RUNNER:[annoyed] [sighs] I say, fair chef, have you seen the King's sheep? CHEF: [The Chef nods] [in a pretty deep voice] Uh-huh. [Homestar and Pom-Pom look at each other, suprised] [So Homestar called everyone together...] [Blackboard appears and graduate cap and pointer fall into Homestar's head and non-existent hand from above] HOMESTAR RUNNER: [while drawing a sheep and a dragon] I have found that the King's sheep were not' eaten by a dragon [X's off dragon]'' KING OF TOWN: Phew! HOMESTAR RUNNER: ... but, they were eaten! KING OF TOWN: Oh, no! What could have done such a thing? HOMESTAR RUNNER: Why don't you ask yourself, King? [pokes King's belly with pointer] KING OF TOWN: ...Oh, yeah. They were delicious! [blushes and burps] [everyone laughs] HOMESTAR RUNNER: [laughs] Did you hear that Pom-Pom? He ate the sheep! ''[continues laughing as we pan out of the castle onto a sheep grazing in the field] === End === Commentary of The King Of Town. Strong Bad does the commentary while the cartoon plays. STRONG BAD: Uh, hello and welcome to The King of Town special edition DVD. I am your host, America's number one son and sweetheart to all the ladies, Strong Bad. You're probably wondering what I'm doing the commentary on this cartoon for, and it's because they didn't put me in the freakin' cartoon, so, the least they could do is let me make fun of it. So, let's uh, let's begin. Okay, now, this guy does not belong in cartoons. From what I understand, he's everybody's least favorite character, and I don't understand how he got his own freakin' cartoon, and I haven't even got... my own cartoon yet. Oh, and the special effects here; look at that piece of crap! I mean, I really think that was a piece of crap tied to some strings... that they just... pulled up behind the mountains, you know... And here comes mister prancy-time himself, Homestar Runner, to save the day. Personally, I don't know what he's doing not wearing his hat, because, he looks kinda creepy whe- when he doesn't wear his baseball hat. Or whatever that hat is, you got the propeller on it... I hate everything about that guy. Oh, now this guy had some class. The blacksmith, that guy was a good guy. I hang out after the cartoon, we had some good times. Yeah, we-- oh, and THIS freakin' guy, man, he STANK SO BAD! I mean... you know, I would say that he smelled like crap, but that wouldn't go far enough enough. Imagine the worst thing you ever smelled, and pretend that took a crap. THAT'S what he smelled like. And this little guy, he gave me the creeps... I don't trust that guy any farther than I could throw him. Oh, and Homestar wearing the graduate cap... I'll tell you what, I mean, Homestar never graduated from anything in his life. And, uh, that little X he just made... to tell you the truth, I don't think that he would ever be able to tell you that it was an X because I'm pretty sure he doesn't know the alphabet and I'm almost positive he can't read, so. Oh yeah, everyone has a good laugh... And that place, the King of Town does not live in that castle! I can tell you that right now. I mean, like, he lives in like some two bedroom job next door to me. It's kinda run down and creepy. Yeah, you don't want to go over there, man. |