Send me your telegrams and I shall steal you some fresh jam!

Dear The Sneak STOP
Does Sir Strong Bad treat you well STOP
Sincerely STOP
The Princessof the Kingdom of StrongBadia STOP

Dear Princess STOP
I am usually treated somewhat respectfully STOP
Many think I am forced to do Strong Bad's dirty work STOP
However the capers we engage in are actually my dastardly schemes STOP
That's why they call me the Dapper Swindler STOP
--The Sneak STOP