STRONG BAD: {singing} And I pretend that it's made of money (stops singing) -- Oh! Um... Look, uh, I'm not doin' one this week. Yeah... not doin' one. So... bye! (singing again) And I pretend that it's made of money.

{The Cheat enters and looks at the computer, then looks around for anyone. He then grins at the camera fiendishly. A new Flash cartoon begins. The cartoon is apparently made by The Cheat, as evidenced by the horrible graphic quality.}

STRONG BAD: (singing) Eeeeeeeeeemail. Ooh, ah, email, ooh, ah --

{Reading the email}

Dear Strong Bad,

Can you run a mile.

The Lodge, MN

STRONG BAD {typing}: You'd better believe it, Seb, I can ride I can do cartwheels for a mile. Ready and one and set and go!

{Strong Bad cartwheels away from his desk. Cut to a shot of him cartwheeling through the TV room from left to right.}

TV ANNOUNCER: TV show featuring The Cheat in a Trans Am.

STRONG BAD: Here I go.

{The scene cuts to a lot with a bunch of buses that say Skol (with an accent over the o)}

Strong Bad: Here I go again on my own.

{Bubs appears from behind a fence. He appears to have no lower body}

BUBS: Hey Strong Bad, you jumped over some of my buses!

{"A new record!! 19 buses!!" appears in the air}

{Scene cuts to Marzipan}

MARZIPAN: Keep it up, Strong Bad. Keep up the pace!

STRONG BAD: Thanks for cheering me on.

{Scene cuts to a brick wall, standing in the middle of a field}

STRONG BAD: Half way to go. I have to break through this brick wall.

{He rolls foward and the wall doesn't give him any resistance. The bricks fall down and spell "HI"}

{Scene cuts to Homestar holding a sign that says "I love cooties"}

'HOMESTAR RUNNER: Check it out, b-hand.

{Strong Bad trips Homestar}

{Scene cuts to Strong Bad finishing his mile on an athletic track, with flashbulbs everywhere}

{Scene cuts to everyone standing around, waiting for Strong Bad. Coach Z is pink}

COACH Z: Mr. Strong Bad, you won the mile, how'd did what's your secret?

STRONG BAD: The Cheat.

{The Cheat parachutes in from the top of the frame, wearing a light blue tuxedo and sunglasses and holding a glass of champagne. Money is stuffed into his tuxedo pocket. He lands on the ground and raises up his glass.}

EVERYBODY: The Cheat is a millionaire! A parade for The Cheat!

{A parade goes by, featuring a The Cheat float that says "Dunkin' the Ch8t", a The Cheat hot air balloon, fireworks, and The Poopsmith pushing a broom at the end, then the scene cuts back to Strong Bad's computer.}

STRONG BAD {typing}: So yes, Jimmy-Jimmy, there have been parades honoring The Cheat, but don't let that from stopping you from organizing your own. He can be the Grand... Marshall. He's also available for proms and pizza parties.

{He actually types: So yes, Jimmy-Jimmy, there have been p's h-ing the C. B. d. l. t. f. s. y. f. o. y. o. He can be the Grand Marshall. He's a-so availabe for proms and pizza parties.}

STRONG BAD: So, okay folks, I gotta go to my next show. See you later nice-time!

{At the end, a cheated-up version of the paper comes down with a sound effect that just sounds like some guy going "Kerrrriorrrr..."}

The sound is actually part of the original Homestar Runner intro.- (StrongBadZone22)?

No, you're referring to a different sound which happens after the paper's sound effect. --Upsilon

The "Here I go again on my own" is obviously a reference to Whitesnake
The Fireworks noises for the parade are the ones from Super Mario Bros. when you run the flag up at just the right time.