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Tue, 15 Jun 2004 20:39:35 . . . . THE TOAD


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STRONGBAD: (singing) Email me -doot doot- email me, email me -doot doot- email me.

(reading)
Hi Strong Bad!
Do you celebrate thanksgiving normally? Or do you have special traditions for when Strong Badia was first colonized? What's the story about?

From your Buddy,
Shana Ma.
Los Angeles, CA

(typing)
Oh, Shanama, the story of the colonization of Strong Badia is a tale as old as, say, the wireless web... or energy drinks, maybe.

(reading from a book)
It began in a period of strife, when I was being persecuted for my beliefs.
"Ewwww! Ketchup on Eggs?!?"

(next page of book)
I learned of a place where a man can be free. Free to do what he wants to do. Free to ketchup his eggs without being hassled by the man.

(next page of book)
So I started out with three stout sub sandwiches, and my best, The Cheat, to find this mystical land.

(next page of book)
I met a strange man with strange ways and strange odors.

(next page of book)
And he led me to the new world, out beyond the dumpsters.

(next page of book)
There was a brief struggle with the indigenous peoples.

(next page of book)
At last, we reached an agreement to peacefully co-exist in this land, after I gave him my first and last months' rent deposit.

(next page of book)
Then the strange man showed me how to plant fish in the ground with corn, for some reason.
"This'll grow ya some nice fishcorn bushes!"

(next page of book)
Then we celebrated with a feast of some cold Hardee's he had laying around.

(typing)
So there you have it, Shana... Shanamana... Shanamanamanamanamana tonight! That shoulda been in your history books at school. I gotta get on those people over at Hoofton Mifflin. Those guys are slackin off.

(stops typing)
Okay, so until next week, leave me alone!

(The paper)