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{Marzipan and Homestar Runner are in costumes, Marzipan as an angel and Homestar as the King of Town.} HOMESTAR RUNNER: Wow. I can't believe the night of the big Decemberween pageant has finally arrived! After all the weeks and weeks of rehearsing and practicing and memorizing lines... MARZIPAN: Homestar, I don't think those are your lines. {Zoom out to see that they're both onstage, actually performing. The audience laughs.} HOMESTAR RUNNER: What?! {Cut to the title sequence. "A DECEMBERWEEN PAGEANT" "THE USUAL CREDITS" "FADE TO COMMERCIAL" It fades to black, then comes back on with the "A DECEMBERWEEN PAGEANT" title.} ANNOUNCER: A Decemberween Pageant is brought to you by Fluffy Puff Marshmallows and Marshmallow Mayonnaise. {singing poorly} "Made from the best stuff!" And Litigation Jackson, in theaters December 27th! {Fade to black. It fades up on Bubs and the King of Town, the latter of whom is wearing a Santa outfit.} THE KING OF TOWN: Puts on a Burger King crown and thinks he's cock of the block! I can't believe they cast Homestar as the King of Town. BUBS: Yep. They did. THE KING OF TOWN: At least I still get to play Dr. Christmas. I can't wait to-- BUBS: Oh yeah! I forgot to tell you about that. Uh... {Bubs takes the cap from the King of Town, puts it on, and walks off. Coach Z pops his head in.} COACH Z: Uh... Kingy? You can go home. {Cut to the stage, where Bubs and Strong Bad are on. Strong Bad has a spear, a turtleneck, and a beanie cap.} BUBS: Archibald! We've got to find the first Decemberween! STRONG BAD: I'll search down by the docks. BUBS: What? STRONG BAD: The docks. I'll search down by the docks. BUBS: Ooh. I thought you said ducks. Good thinking! I'll come with ya. {They walk off, applause is heard. Cut to backstage as they continue walking and Coach Z is there.} COACH Z: Now that's what I call actin', boys! Don't go too far, Bubs! You're on again in farve! {Cut to Marzipan and Pom Pom, who is wearing a Lakers jersey.} MARZIPAN: I hardly recognize the Cheat, his costume is really convincing. {Cut to back on stage. Bubs is there, as well as Homestar Runner, and The Cheat, who is wearing a sign that says "The Popular Vote". There are gears in the background.} BUBS: We'll need fifty bags of jold! I mean, gold! Fifty bag of golds. HOMESTAR RUNNER: I just can't do it, Dr. Christmas. Famine has ruined all the town's gold. Let us away, Popular Vote! {Homestar starts getting lifted up by a rope. Pulley sounds are heard and Homestar is grunting. The audience boos, then applauds. Homestar stops at about halfway up.} STRONG BAD: {offstage} Okay. That's all you're getting out of me. {The curtain closes.} Guy's like a frickin' house. {We hear a thud.} HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oww! {Cut to backstage. Strong Sad is holding his head.} STRONG SAD: Augh! I'm totally freaking out here! I can't remember my lines, and if I don't remember my lines, then I'll ruin the whole play! At least the pageant. {Cut back to the stage. Strong Bad is in a boat named the "USS Trimball" and there are cardboard cut-out waves being pulled back and forth, along with tentacles sticking out of stage right.} STRONG BAD: How unfortunate! Oh, what a terrible fate has bestowed with me...uh, become to me... There's a squid. {Cut to later, onstage, with Marzipan and The Cheat standing by a prop Eiffel Tower.} MARZIPAN: I'll never forget you, Popular Vote, not in a million years! {the Cheat starts crying} Don't cry! Popular Votes aren't supposed to cry! You might rust. {audience laughs} {Cut to backstage, with Coach Z) COACH Z: Oh! Hey! Ooh! Where's Strong Sad? He's on in two scenes! HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh. He got nervous and went to the bathroom. I think he might be up-chucking. {Coach Z goes to Strong Mad} COACH Z: Hey Strong Mad. I need you to go get your brother. STRONG MAD: I'M OPEN! I'M OPEN! COACH Z: 'Course you are, big guy. 'Course you are. {Cut to the stage where Strong Bad, Bubs, Marzipan, and Homestar Runner are doing a music number.} STRONG BAD: {singing} Everyone's searching, looking and searching... MARZIPAN: {singing} And everyone's hanging around! BUBS: {singing} And who can be sure if we're looking for something? HOMESTAR RUNNER: {singing} And looking for something I am! {Cut to Strong Mad and Strong Sad in the bathroom. Strong Sad has locked himself in a stall.} STRONG SAD: I'll be there in a second. Tell them to make something up until I get out there. {Cut to the stage. Bubs, Marzipan, and Homestar Runner are standing there.} BUBS: Everybody knows me! My name's Cornbread! {Strong Bad walks in} STRONG BAD: Uhh... I found that computer. I think it can help us! BUBS: So, this computer you speak of. Where is it? STRONG BAD: Umm... on the moon. It's a moon computer. {Cut to backstage with Strong Sad.} STRONG SAD: Remember your line, remember your line! {Back to the stage} MARZIPAN: I can take you there! Everyone hop on! {Strong Sad walks on.} BUBS: Behold! The first Decemberween! STRONG SAD: What? {The audience claps} HOMESTAR RUNNER: This is the first Decemberween ever! {Applause gets louder, the curtains close, and "THE END" appears.} |