Halloween Carve-nival Transcription

Coach Z: I mean the first one was great. After the second one, they really fell orf. I mean, a pajama Jamie-jam?

Strong Sad: I rarely know what you’re talkin about.

KOT: Doh! I’m a video game!

Marzipan: I don’t play video games, so I wouldn’t know.

Bubs: *Snicker*

Strong Bad: What?! What are you laughing at?!

Bubs: Oh, nothin. You look great. *Snicker.*

Strong Bad: Course I look great! I’m da bee.

Bubs: In actuality, I don’t think he looks that great.

Homestar: Ok, everyone. Thanks for comin to my party, you all look great, blah, blah, blah. It’s time for the judging of the pumpkiiiins! Pchew! Pchew! Wchew! That was, the lightning… The Cheat, would you mind assisting me?

The Cheat: *Affirmative Cheat noises.*

Pumpkin -A sad looking carving of Strong Sad’s face-

Homestar: Ok, contestant number one, your name is- Strong.. Sad? Oh. Anyways, please explain your pumpkin.

Strong Sad: I call it "Self Portrait in Late October".

Homestar: I call it last place. Ding! *LAST ribbon appears.* Next contestant!

Strong Sad: I’m doomed.

Pumpkin -A mostly finished pumpkin pie-

Homestar: Alright Mr. Of Town. Just what is going on over here?

KOT: Well, I was at home…

Homestar: Uh-huh.

KOT: With the pumpkin…

Homestar: Ok.

KOT: It was looking…

Homestar: Right.

KOT: Particularly luscious…

Homestar: Yah, that’s gross.

KOT: And then…

Homestar: Uh-huh.

KOT: The next thing I know it was a…

Homestar: Go on.

KOT: A pie and then…

Homestar: I see, go on.

KOT: The next thing I know it was…

Homestar: Ok.

KOT: Oh, the pie was gone and…

Homestar: Right, right.

KOT: Doo hoo?

Homestar: Whadaya think the cheat?

The Cheat: *Cheat noises.* (translates to: "The King of Town is so lame" according to the Strong Bad email, Cheat Talk)

Homestar: I concur. Worst place! Ding! *WORST ribbon appears.*

KOT: Sorry, King, but our princess is in another castle…

Pumpkin –Uncarved pumpkin-

Strong Mad: BOOO!

Homestar: Alright. This guy’s tall. Hey the Cheat, ask you friend here whycome he didn’t carve his pumpakin.

The Cheat: *Cheat noises.*

Strong Mad: Whar?! *Punches eyes and a mouth into the pumpkin.*

Homestar: Now that’s talent! Good prize! *Ding! noise is heard, although Homestar doesn’t say it. GOOD ribbon appears.*

Strong Mad: Gah?

Pumpkin –W-

Homestar: Alright coach, whadaya got for me?

Coach Z: Check it out, yo!

Homestar: Cool. A w. What’s that supposed to stand for? Witch’s brew?

Coach Z: No, no, no, it stands for tha Wootang!

Homestar: Coach Z, are you a poser?

Coach Z: Nah, man, I’m down.

Homestar: Down with second to last place. *Sarcastically.* Ding. *2nd to last ribbon appears.*

Pumpkin –Rotting, brown, sunken in pumpkin. Click to activate Easter Egg.-

Homestar: *Whispers* Just keep walking the Cheat.

Poop Smith: Hiiissss!

Easter Egg Pumpkin –Spoon taped to an eggplant-

Homestar: Oh, brother. Whadaya make of this guy, the Cheat?

The Cheat: *Cheat noises*

Homestar: I know, me too. What do you have to say for yourself, little man?

Homsar: I’m the ghost of Christmas paaaast.

Homestar: Wow, you’ve set a new standard for last place. You don’t get a ding. *Drops a LAST ribbon.*

Homsar: And also with you.

Pumpkin –Carving of a sexy woman laying back-

Homestar: Pom-Pom!

Pom-Pom: *Bubbly noises.*

Homestar: What’s up my main man? My dawg! My ace in tha hole! 2nd place. *2nd ribbon appears.*

Pom-Pom: *Annoyed bubbly noises.*

Pumpkin –Uncarved, on the vine pumpkin-

Homestar: Whatcha got here, Marzipan?

Marzipan: I didn’t want to kill mine, so I just left it on the vine.

Homestar: What for? So you could like, use it in a witch’s brew or something?

Marzipan: Um, I don’t know what that means. Anyway, I wrote a song about it. *Sings* I left it on the vine, I left it on the line, I mean, I left it on the-

Homestar: Not nessecary! Last place! Ding! *LAST ribbon appears.*

Marzipan: Homestar, I’m breaking up with you.

Pumpkin –Pumpkin has been stabbed, wrapped in barb wire, and had googly eyes put on it-

Homestar: Hey Strong Bad. So, um, are you supposed to be the Green Hornet?

Strong Bad: What?! No!

Homestar: Oh, right, right, you’re supposed to be the um, the witch’s brew.

Strong Bad: No! I’m the bee! Like, from nature.

Homestar: Oh, great. So what’s up with your pumpkin?

Strong Bad: Well, I stabbed it a bunch and then wrapped it in barb wire, and then I felt sorry for it so, um, I gave it some googly eyes.

Homestar: That sure was nice of you. You get most improved. Ding! *Most Improved ribbon appears.*

Pumpkin –A rip cord, spark plugs, and exhaust pipes have been shoved into the pumpkin-

Homestar: Hey Bubs

Bubs: Hey Homestar.

Homestar: What’s up?

Bubs: Not a whole lot.

Homestar: What’s that?

Bubs: That’s just my pumpkin.

Homestar: Cool. Does it do anything?

Bubs: Oh yah. Check this out. *He pulls the rip cord causing a motor to start and flames to come out of the exhaust. This makes the Cheat start screaming and run off.*

Homestar: Woah. Looks like you scared the Cheat.

Bubs: Yeah, I guess I did.

Homestar: Not last place. *Not Last ribbon appears.*

Bubs: *Sings.* I feel so fine, I feel so elated, I feel so fine, I feel so elated!

Homestar: Well, I guess that’s everybody. Thanks for your help the Cheat. *The Cheat is still scared and hanging onto Homestar’s legs.* You all did great. Hope to see you again next year!

Marzipan: Well, who won? I think your rating system is questionable.

Homestar: Oh, right, right, a winner and such. Well… *Strong Bad busts out of Homestar’s head.* I won! Ding!

Bubs:What the-?

Coach Z: What’s goin on here?

The Real Homestar: *Walks up* Yah, what’s goin on here?

Strong Bad: Oh man, you guys are so stupid. You thought I dressed up as the bee? This is the best costume ever!

Marzipan: Well, wait a minute, then who’s that Strong Bad? *Strong Bad unzips himself to reveal the goblin.*

All: Gasp!

Bubs: It’s that goblin!

The Real Homestar: Ooooh! That explains everything. Ding! *The end ribbon appears on the screen.*