Please note: You are viewing the pre-MediaWiki version of the Homestar Runner Wiki. Editing is disabled for purposes of historical preservation.
|
1 - arms 2 - girlfriend 3 - itchy 4 - japaneese suntan 5 - drug free 6 - strong sad Marzipan: I'm going to check my e-m-a-i-l! Dear Marzipan, What's up with your body? Are you like, a mutated broom from the Disney movie Fantasia? And also, is the lack of arms a birth defect carried over from your father? If so, does that make Homestar related to you or is that just coincidence? Gemini Seattle, Washington Gem and you hurt my feelings. I am in no way related to Homestar, and I am NOT a mutated broom. And I do have arms, but I think Homestar has the charts proving it. (dials Homestar on her phone) cut to Homestar, talking to PomPom Homestar: ...and here, are ninteen tomatoes. Oh wait, my phone's ringing. PomPom, do you hear that? My phone, it's ringing. Yello? Marzipan: Hi, Homestar. I need those charts proving we have arms. Homestar: Oh, right, right, those charts. I'll get right on it. Later... Homestar: I have the charts, Marzipan! Marzipan: That's just a self-portrait! Homestar: I know! Isn't that great? Marzipan (back to typing): So you see, Jem and you, we do have arms. Now let me just stop Homestar from drawing his self portrait on everything. ------------------------------------------------ Dear Marzipan, Are you really Homestar's girlfriend? You sure don't act like it CE5, (Adress Unknown) Marzipan: Of course I am! Hey wait, I'm getting another email: Dear Strong Bad, Do you have a secret crush on Marzipan Oh yeah, I really don't like him at all... {walks off} -------------------------------------------------- Dear Marzipan, My head is ichy, can you sing a song to make it stop? AlphaZodiac. Marzipan: No. ------ Dear Marzipan, I thought you looked cute and all as a japanese cartoon with the big eyes and everything. ^_~ I was thinking you might look better If you got out in the sun and got a nice tan. I've heard a tan helps your muscles stand out. Dan, MR Marzipan: I was a japanese cartoon? I'll have to ask about that... {Cut to Homestar's house. He is with PomPom and Coach Z} Homestar: Hey, look guys, it's Marzipan! She probably wants to go on a date with me. Marzipan: Homestar, have I been in a japanese cartoon? Homestar: Um, I think you should ask Strong Bad about that. Coach Z (whispering to Homestar): Tell her "your hair is well combed". Homestar: Your lair is well what? Marzipan: I'm leaving. {At Strong Bad's house} Strong Bad: ...OK, The Cheat, don't light anything on fire until... Oh, hello Marzipan, break up with Homestar yet? Marzipan: No, I came to ask if I've been in a japanese cartoon. Strong Bad: Oh yeah, I'll go get the tape. OK, japanese menu page tape, here it is! {shows 20X6 Marzipan} Marzipan: OK, thanks, Strong Bad. Strong Bad: Do you hear that? Marzipan likes me! ---- Marzipan: Today, all your questions will be answered! Dear Marzipan, I know this is kinda personal, but since your a hippie, do you smoke marijuana? Jack Selby Marzipan: No! I ran a drug free parade! I just bought a tape from Discount Flashback Warehouse to show you! {In the tape, the pparade is going on} Marzipan (holding camera): Welcome to the Free Country USA parade! Homestar: MARZIPAN HAS A GUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! Marzipan: Maybe Strong Bad has some drug-free opinions. Strong Bad: Look, get that camera out of my face. Marzipan: Does anyone care at all? {Pom Pom bubbles. The Poopsmith shrugs.) Strong Sad: Well Marzipan, maybe the fact there's no drugs in a 100 mile ra- Marzipan: I need some quiet time. {The tape stops} Marzipan: As you can see, it was a success. ---- MARZIPAN: Email is a great protest! Dear Marzipan, Were you freaked out when Strong Sad was caffinated? MARZIPAN: I think you are suposed to have a name. {She goes back and writes "Mary" under the email.} MARZIPAN: I'm not done with you yet. I never, ever want to see you use launguage like that again. Strong Sad helped a great work of art, actually. It's called... {Strong Bad enters. He reads the email and Marzipan's responce.} MARZIPAN: What can I do for you, Stron- STRONG BAD: Are you talking about that thing... "wood-davers?" MARZIPAN: Yes, I was. Now if you'd just leave- STRONG BAD: That thing was total crap, man. Anyway, Strong Sad is coming to visit and... he can't use your answering machine... because... {He speeds off. A crash is heard, and Strong Bad's voice says "I've been sending you all these messages!" Strong Sad then enters.} STRONG SAD: Oh, hey, Marzipan. I came to see the artwork you told me about... MARZIPAN: I was just about to show someone that. {They enter a huge room with a wooden, spintering, airplane.} STRONG SAD: Oh, it's good and all, but... I thought it wouldn't be from the natural history museum. {The Paper falls.} --- Dear Marzy, So, is the King of Town your dad? There have been so many debates about it, we want to know if it's true. Also, it's nice that you're growing your hair for charity. Which one? Charity, I mean. - Strong Lad Free City, UK. ---- Marzipan, Do you plan on marrying Homestar anytime soon? You've been dating him for a few years. I think you should get married to him, but live in your house. It's nicer. -Anonymous |